Stanky Stuff

Since we are talking about “brands” of stuff this week, I thought I’d review a few items in my bathroom. In fact, what brought this thought on was disgust with something in my bathroom this morning. I know, this could be so many things! But it was actually something you wouldn’t expect to be disgusting. So obviously, the first review is less than stellar.

Have you ever encountered a drunk baby? No, I certainly hope not because the very idea is outrageous! But can you imagine what a drunk baby might smell like? Just think about a thick fog of white baby powder mixed with noxious, undulating alcohol fumes around a poor, sweet infant. It’s just repugnant, is it not? So why on earth would I want to spray something that made me think of this atrocity on my hair and then expose others to it by going out in public? I do not want to do this. Yet, as I sit here typing, my nose is afflicted by this very acrid smell. What is the source?  Dove Hair Therapy, Style + Care, Strength & Shine, Extra Hold Hairspray. Aside from having the longest name ever, it also wins the stinkiest ever hairspray prize. Even the smallest amount of this hairspray will make your hair smell like an extremely elderly lady who’s lost her sense of smell, and has applied copious amounts of perfume under the assumption she is covering the stench of her abscessing corpulence, but without realizing she is only adding funk to fetor.

So, you might be asking yourself why I have applied this pungent vulgarity to my head today? The simple answer, my dear friend, is that I was too lazy to go downstairs and get my other hairspray.

Aside from the stank, I have not found its “hold” to be either Extra or Strong, and any Shine that it induces is very short-lived. So, in my opinion, this Hair Therapy needs some serious therapy of its own. I will not be using it again! (Unless, of course, I forget to take my other hairspray upstairs.)

Can’t Keep Your Hands off Your Face

Next up is something I love!