Every time I get on social media there is always some debate happening amongst “friends.” Sometimes they are about personal matters, but generally the arguments ensue over political and/or religious opinions. Because of the recent hate crimes the popular argument has been over gun control, but is it just gun control? No, as the arguments rage on, every other controversial topic is pulled in as evidence to back the original point and soon enough it’s not the topics that are being debated at all. The issues quickly become secondary to belittling the people that hold a differing opinion. These are not healthy debates. These arguments breed hate, looping back to the very thing which caused the original discussion, a hate crime.

Now, I am not innocent in this. I’ve had my fair share of bouts on controversial issues. There was a time when I prided myself on my debating skills. For a while, I even hinged my identity on being an arguer, a fighter. I was opinionated, impulsive and though I could not see it, I was almost always driven by my opinions and emotions rather than logic and facts. No, I haven’t become a monk, or a saint or anything remotely so pure and dispassionate. But, I have been on a journey to gain control of my own mind and it has helped me see the world in a clearer light.

Here are some truths: