There’s a lot of talk going around. You know, political talk and whatnot. People are sharing their views on candidates, issues and beliefs. We are in that extra sensitive time of every quadrennium when you might get punched in the face for sharing what’s on your mind. Which is why I’m not going to share my political opinions here. The Hubster and I already argue enough about politics at home, so my cup is full on that front. No, instead I’m mostly going to talk about some generalities that have been stewing in my brain of late.
Growing up as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I remember being told on occasion by “friends” that I was brainwashed by Mormonism. Of course as a teenager, if anyone came within a stone’s throw a comet flying by Jupiter of insulting me then I would become as defensive as, well, a teenage girl. So if someone even insinuated that I was brainwashed by my religion, I would quickly snap at them like a rabid dog, and sometimes I’d even go the extra mile and do things in direct opposition to my beliefs just to prove my brain was still dirty and not at all washed. But as an adult, I now realize that I am brainwashed. And you know what? So are you.
If you are appalled by that statement then you either haven’t stewed on it long enough, or you’re in ignorant denial. It’s not an insult. It’s just a fact. We are all brainwashed by something(s), so the question is, what brand(s) of brainwash have you chosen and how’s that working out for you?
You can buy all kinds of brainwash for the cleansing of your cranial lobes. Besides religious brands, there are cultural, political, societal, occupational, educational brands, and that’s all on top of an extra strength familial detergent. And don’t even get me started on commercial brainwashing (If you have a ShamWow, you know what I mean.) The effects of these washes vary. Some may cause discrimination while others may cause generosity. Some breed skepticism while others create hope and optimism. The application of the wash, such as frequency and quantity, affects outcome as well.
Have you and your spouse (hang with me if you’re single) ever argued about finances because everyone you know has something that you don’t have? For example, almost every mom I know has a fancy shmancy DSLR camera and they’re always posting these super perfect pictures of their kids on social media. So, I tell my frugal (read tightwad) husband that “I NEEED a fancy shmancy DSLR camera because I NEED to make picture perfect, crystal clear, artsy fartsy memories with our adorable and completely cooperative kids (read ‘irritable, camera shy and generally unphotogenic.’) I mean, surely if the Whojimups can afford a DSLR camera then so can we!”
So, my penny-pinching husband, whom I love and respect (read “but sometimes he makes me want to slam my head into the computer screen while discussing the budget!”), says “Those cameras are really expensive and you have a phone that takes perfectly good pictures. Just because someone else has one, doesn’t mean you should get one too.” Yes, he used a classic parenting line on me…on more than one occasion…and he’s right…but I still NEED a camera.
But you see my point, I am bathing my brain in a bucket full of Idealistic Stay-At-Home-Mom Brainwash, Now with Bubbles! But The Hubster likes to pop those bubbles with his generic brand of Austere Encephalon Exfoliant. I think things should be one way because of the style of life I’m immersed in, yet he feels differently because his world is behind a computer where he often counts our dollars (or lack thereof). The same could be said of any ideology, lifestyle or belief system. I know, I know. Traditionally brainwashing is thought to be a method of controlled systematic indoctrination, especially one based on repetition or confusion, generally used in totalitarian countries (thanks Dictionary.com), which has a somewhat negative connotation. But, aside from the totalitarianism thing, you could say that just about any kind of ongoing narrative you subject yourself to is brainwashing. Fox News, NPR (don’t jump to conclusions about my political affiliations), the neighborhood gossip group, Cosmo, church (do you like how I just put Cosmo and church next to each other?), college, Facebook/Twitter/Pinterest (admit it, you’re addicted to social media), your job as a Project Manager in a plastic bag brokerage company (I know that’s not your real job, but you can imagine how brainwashing that would be), etc. Face it, whatever you’ve got going on in your life alters your perspective on the world. If you were a bushman in Africa, that would be weird because you wouldn’t have a computer to read this, but just pretend anyway. If you were a bushman in Africa then your brand of Brainwash would probably be something like Find Water and Run from Big Teeth, but you would have to make the wash yourself because there are no stores in the bush. I agree, that was a lame joke. But you get my point, right? Every day you are submerged in a big vat of potent brain wash. The beauty is you can decide which soaps you use.
Disclaimer, I’m about to get ever so slightly political, but I’m presenting two sides of the argument, so don’t freak out. Here we go. I have two awesome friends. Let’s call them Jello and Cupcake. Jello and Cupcake are also friends with each other. Jello is an outspoken vaccination advocate. Cupcake is very open about her decision not to vaccinate her kids. Jello and Cupcake have gotten into some very heated debates on social media about this issue (which is why I don’t feel bad talking about them on my blog.) I’m sure you have an opinion about this topic as well. Good for you! At some point you were brainwashed into a preference! (But before you comment with your personal views on this issue, let me be clear. I don’t want to hear them. Got it? Good. Moving on.) Jello’s brainwash brand is I’m a Nurse with 3 Young Kids and My Husband is a Doctor. Cupcake has bathed in the more holistic brand, I Have 8 Kids and One of Them had an Adverse Reaction to Being Vaccinated. Because Jello and Cupcake have different backgrounds and have had different experiences, they have vastly disparate opinions on this particular issue, yet they are still friends. Despite not seeing eye-to-eye on some things, there are plenty of other cerebral cleansers that they have in common. My guess is the same could be said for just about any 2 people on the planet.
Let’s wrap this up because I’m losing momentum and my Suburban Mom Wash has me feeling the urge to make dinner. The more immersed you are in a certain ideology the harder it will be to sway your views which is a great thing if the cranial cleansing you’re getting has a positive impact on your life. After all, our beliefs are what motivate us to be productive. If we aren’t committed to any brand of brainwash then life will lose meaning and purpose. That being said, it’s never too late to change brands if yours isn’t making you happy. Sample different cranial washes the same way you do body washes. If you haven’t found the right one yet, keep looking.
It’s also important to note that brains, no matter how they are washed, reside in the heads of real people. People made of the same stuff as you. Just because you don’t like someone else’s brand doesn’t mean it’s cheaper than yours. So, make sure you invest in some good mouthwash as well.
And that’s all Cersey has to say about that for now.
